Saturday, August 20, 2011

If You Give 2 Preschoolers an Hour

Miss A's birthday was on Thursday, so I decided that we would walk to the park for a picnic lunch. I knew the kids would really enjoy it but when I took a look at their rooms I decided that it would be necessary to have them clean up before we left. I made this discovery at 10:45am, at which point I informed Mr. R. and Miss E. that they needed to clean up. This is what happened.

If you give 2 preschoolers an hour (60 whole minutes to clean up their toys so you can go to the park for a picnic) the following things may happen:
  1. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - the toddler (child #3) will have an explosion in her diaper that will rival Hiroshima.
  2. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - the noise created by cleanup will wake the baby (child #4) up early from her morning nap and she will decide that she wants to eat NOW. Then she will promptly keep falling back to sleep even couple of minutes while eating (because she is still tired), which makes it difficult to monitor progress of the toy cleanup.
  3. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - said preschoolers will stop every few minutes to play with a toy that they found buried under the mess (the reason #2 is so frustrating).
  4. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - a fight will break out between the toddler and one or both of the preschoolers. This will happen because the toddler will begin playing with a toy that is still not put away (I will insert here that the toy the toddler chooses to play with is the one and only toy that the preschooler(s) want to put away).
  5. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - one preschooler will be sitting doing #3 and the toddler, who is not watching where she is walking, will step on the finger of said preschooler causing hysterics that make you think they've completely severed a limb.
  6. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - each preschooler will at some point come to you tattling on the other preschooler.
  7. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - said preschoolers will begin blaming each other for the lack of progress on the cleanup process. If that fails to garner your sympathy, they will begin to blame the toddler.
  8. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - said preschoolers will begin telling you over and over that you just did not give them enough time fore such a big job.
  9. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour - when you inform said preschoolers that cleanup has taken so long that a picnic is no longer possible in the time frame remaining, weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth ensues!
  10. If you give 2 preschoolers an hour, you will inevitably loose all sanity (or whatever sanity was left before the hour began)!

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